When I got to Fenway Friday, I assumed (correctly) that smoking would not be allowed. Now, I love my smokes, and that's hard for me, but worth it in this instance. I also assumed, incorrectly, that I would be able to find a place to smoke when I wasn't in the stands- you know, like near the bathroom or something. I was even willing to step outside the ballpark if need be. Once we got settled, I decided to find out what my options were. I asked the nearest usher guy, and he promptly informed me that not only can you not smoke in the park, re-entry is not allowed. Not. Allowed. That isn't cool but I am a seasoned smoker. There is really no such thing as "no smoking". There's always a place and a way and I figured I'd be able to find it as I have in so many other "no smoking" instances.Alas and alack n shit. I did what would normally work: I asked employees- the pizza stand cashier and the bathroom attendant.* Nada. I sucked it up as long as I could. I ate my pizza slowly. I sipped at my beer. I even got popcorn and picked at that for most of the game but as any smoker knows, at some point none of that is going to be enough. Finally I went into a bathroom stall, took a couple of hard hits and exhaled toward the flushing toilet (as if that really helps, but I was paranoid!).
Fast forward to now, and I stumble upon the above gem on the internets. Click on the image if you can't read the fine print. Note that Fenway Park is in PINK. There ARE ways to sneak cigarettes! More research is necessary to make sure my next Fenway experience isn't marred by extreme jonesing alternating with fear of getting kicked out of the park.
*The bathroom attendant just gave me a Mona Lisa smile and shook her head "no" slowly, no matter how I begged. I KNOW that bitch had the answer and wouldn't tell me. I should have slipped her some money. Bet that woulda opened her mouth.
PS: That site also says, "Thanks to Adam Westlund who pointed out that smoking is possible outside the ballpark on Yawkey Way. " For the record, Yawkey Way IS outside the park. Again, no re-entry, so that is not a viable option. Thanks a fat lot, Adam Westlund.
PSS: When we left the park, I gave a bum three smokes- the three that I wasn't able to smoke while I was in there. Hope he enjoyed them as much as I would have.
Fast forward to now, and I stumble upon the above gem on the internets. Click on the image if you can't read the fine print. Note that Fenway Park is in PINK. There ARE ways to sneak cigarettes! More research is necessary to make sure my next Fenway experience isn't marred by extreme jonesing alternating with fear of getting kicked out of the park.
*The bathroom attendant just gave me a Mona Lisa smile and shook her head "no" slowly, no matter how I begged. I KNOW that bitch had the answer and wouldn't tell me. I should have slipped her some money. Bet that woulda opened her mouth.
PS: That site also says, "Thanks to Adam Westlund who pointed out that smoking is possible outside the ballpark on Yawkey Way. " For the record, Yawkey Way IS outside the park. Again, no re-entry, so that is not a viable option. Thanks a fat lot, Adam Westlund.
PSS: When we left the park, I gave a bum three smokes- the three that I wasn't able to smoke while I was in there. Hope he enjoyed them as much as I would have.
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